Dear Steve and Shirley,

I am writing to get your opinion on friends dating their best friends ex. I'm a 43 year old woman who has a really good male friend of 30 years. We have always been very close and always took good care of each other. We have amazing chemistry and a very good bond very strong bond but we continue to say we are just friends. Friends will hear us say love you and think there is more between us than we were saying, one day two years ago the words, I love you sounded and felt different. 

We both knew what was happening and we expressed our love for each other.

I began to take our friendship to another level. After much conversation about our future and much lovemaking he realized he couldn't pursue a relationship with me because I dated his best friend in high school. They are still best friends today and this best friend has been married for 17 years with three children. I didn't understand the sudden change. We discussed this in the beginning and he said it wouldn't be an issue. Apparently the best friend still has feelings for me and he tells him this on a regular basis. He feels like he would be betraying a childhood friend. I was heartbroken. I told him we were just children when we dated but I still respect it. But I will respect his decision. Now I don't see him often but when i do we share some very passionate and intimate moments. Every morning he sends me a good morning text and every night he sends me goodnight. I love you. It is very clear that he loves me but he has chosen his friendship over our love should this even be an issue. 

Should I still be considered the ex of his best friend