Dear Steve and Shirley,
In high school, I liked a girl and she liked me. We talked on the phone and hung out together all the time. Her mom and my mom were close too, so she was always at my house or I was at hers.
By the time we graduated from high school, we were even closer, and I told her that I wanted her to be more than my friend. She's always been really close to her mom and tells her everything, so she told her mom that she and I were dating. Her mom told her that I was her cousin.
When she told me we were related, I felt strange because we had kissed a few times. We never questioned it. Though we stopped dating and remained very close cousins, we still did everything together and told each other everything.
By the time we were in our mid-twenties, we had both had a bunch of bad relationships and always ended up back together. I realized that I loved my "quote-unquote" cousin and that she's the perfect woman for me.
So I finally asked my mom if we were really related. My mom said we’re related somewhere down the line, but there's no way to find out now because all of the older relatives are deceased. I told my mom that I’m in love with her and I want to be with her. My mom told me to follow my heart.
I couldn’t wait to tell my cousin how I really felt, and I was relieved when she told me she’s been in love with me forever. Since then, we’ve made love a few times, and I asked her to marry me. She wants to do a search of our family tree first.
I don’t think we’re cousins, and I feel like this is only postponing our happiness. Should we search for answers or not?